Dukie's Butt and cancelled Christmas

I realize that some of you know this story already, however it has been requested by a faithful friend. My computer skills stink, so I am going to try to copy and paste. Let's see if this works!

Good AM to you!I just wanted to let you know that I finished the book last night and I thought it was really good. A little depressing, but good. Hope you enjoy.I also want to thank you guys for your concerns over the craziness of my life. Things have settled down again after a bad weekend. At one point CHRISTMAS WAS CANCELLED!! I honestly did not know that my mother had that kind of power. I thought she at least had to consult Jesus or Santa Claus or somebody. But don't worry, she has recalled her decree and we can all breathe a collective sigh of relief. I finally told ALL parties that I no longer want to talk about this situation. For Chrissake I have Dukie's bleeding bunghole to think about.

Dukie had his surgery on Monday and now has a shaved butt. In the right light you might just mistake him for a baboon. NICE!!!! Hope you all were able to visualize that. Anyhoo, obviously the people at the vet's office do NOT know me. They let me know that they kept the tumor. I am not sure if the nurse makes necklaces out of them or perhaps we could hang it on our Christmas tree, now that Christmas is back on. She then suggested if Dukie starts to pull at his stitches I should rub Vaseline on his butt. I am not sure what horrified face I made, but she then left. I can't pick up dog shit in the back yard without my gag reflex going into overdrive, can you even imagine me greasing up Dukie's bunghole? Sorry Lady, AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN!! If she said anus one more time I was going to punch her. Add it to the list of moist panty ballsack tiddies and pizzeria of words that are greatly upsetting. Oh, I can't forget UNDERPANTS!!!!