Cougar

I went to see Chuck Berry last night. It was the first time in about 8 years that I went to a smokey bar with the intent on watching the band. I was not enthused about this evening but agreed to attend. It was crowded and smokey (which is difficult for a once again recovering nicotine addict, which is how I am referring to myself, looking for the whole sympathy angle) and filled with very young college students (who have no sense of personal space) and creepy old men. Considering that Chuck Berry is a creepy old man I was not terribly surprised that his following had a similar background.

Anyway, I sipped on my beer making polite conversation with J.'s colleagues when the opening band came on stage. I was a little irritated that there was an opening band but I was willing to give them a chance. It was then that I felt my age. I have never been older than a band I was watching. I have been the same age but never older and in this circumstance A LOT older. The lead singer was so cute. I have to refer to him that way or it is just creepy. Had I been his age I would have said he was something different but being at least 14 years older than he is, I have to say he is cute. I now understood why there were so many young women at this show. I would have followed this band around too. Not now, because that would be scary.

Finally, Chuck Berry took the stage. He was sparkly and old and forgot all the words to the songs, but he is 81 years old and still filling a room full of people at $30 a pop. I wish I could do that. Luckily for me I was standing next to a young man(big friggin dork) who was drinking heavily and attempting to romance a young woman (big friggin dork). Dork mating season was occurring right before my eyes and sometimes on my foot. On the other side was a creepy guy grinding on his equally creepy date. (Not sure how you grind to Chuck Berry, but I think Mary had a little lamb could have been playing and he would be doing the same thing). And finally from behind J. was the "WOO HOO" guy. I love this guy. It doesn't matter what is happening he is compelled to "WOOOOO HOOOOOOOO"! Usually it startles you because it is not at the socially appropriate time. It is as if he is overtaken and must expel this exclamation or he will explode. Then I start to wonder if it is a tic of some sort.

I gave it 45 minutes. When Chuck Berry referred to having sex, I had enough.